5 Things I wish I knew before I gave birth

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things I wish I knew before I got pregnant

Being pregnant is a milestone in the lives of millions of women. It’s such an amazing thing to see a little being grow inside of you. The first flutters, the first kicks, the first hiccups- it’s the most incredible of feelings! But is it all fun and games when your little nugget makes their appearance into the world? No, not always. Looking back, there are so many things I wish I could’ve known before giving birth that no parenting book could prepare me for.

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5 things I wish I knew before I gave birth

No amount of sleeping in the third trimester prepared me for the sleep deprivation.

  • Everyone told me to rest so I could be ready. I took good care of myself and rested but still faced serious sleep deprivation. I figured “Hey, I can stay up late and get up to work now so I’ll be fine.” Yet, the sleep deprivation you face as a new mom is like something you’ll never ever face again. I remember waking up after falling asleep on the couch nursing my baby and thinking about how bad I needed to call someone in to take the baby so I could sleep. It was awful. I remember the first night that the baby slept 5 hours and I didn’t know what to do with myself because I felt so rested!

Expect the unexpected.

  • Once I hit the third trimester, my OB suggested doing my birth plan. Y’know the one where you decide if you want pain relief, the method of birth you want, etc. I spent forever weighing EVERY option trying to decide what I wanted. Yet when I gave birth, all of that went out the window super quick.
  • I went in not wanting an epidural unless it was necessary. After 12 hours of back labour, I was begging for one. However when I had one, my blood pressure tanked, which meant they needed to let it wear off while keeping me on medicine to bring it back up, and then I had to give birth without anything that would take the pain away!

I think the harder you plan for things to be perfect, the more things change. You need to be able to roll with the punches.

The baby blues are no joke

When the ob warned me about baby blues. Again, thinking I knew it all I said, “Meh. Probably like having a period. A little more emotional than I normally am.”

I was so wrong.

Every night for two weeks my husband would walk in while I was rocking Sophia and I would be sobbing so hard I couldn’t talk. Half the time I was crying just due to sleep deprivation and frustration, but half the time there was no reason! It’s just like my face was leaking! It was awful. But eventually, it got better. It wasn’t an easy few weeks, but it was like a hump, and now that I am over it, all is okay! (See my post on how to survive the baby blues!)

Sometimes you’re going to wonder why you had a baby, and that’s okay.

Going back to the baby blues for a second. I remember it was 3 am. Sophia was crying her head off, even though she was fed and changed. I was sobbing because all I wanted was sleep and I remember saying. “Why did I do this. I can’t handle this.” Immediately as soon as that thought crossed my mind, I felt so guilty. I had this little, innocent being in my arms and I was feeling like that! But I couldn’t shake that feeling.

I felt like the worst mom until I talked to other mom friends and I realized that is a normal feeling with the baby blues. Not only is it normal, but it’s also okay because it goes away. Now I can’t picture my life without my girl.

You’ve never known love until you’ve had a baby.

I’m not saying other types of love don’t matter or they aren’t strong. But before I had my family and my husband and I knew was love was, but when this little thing came out of me, I have never ever ever felt such a love as I had before. My mom always said that a mother’s love is a different kind of love, and it so is. I never knew I could feel a love so deep into my being before.

baby feet

There are soooooo many changes that come with motherhood. But there are so many changes that you can’t prepare for. These are my top 5. What are some things you wish you knew before giving birth? Comment below!

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26 thoughts on “5 Things I wish I knew before I gave birth

  1. Congrats on pregnancy. Check out our blog for moms and moms to be and join our community and conversations. Would love to hear your thoughts and advice you can share with other ladies. Comment on some of our various topics we have up and under older posts ☺️

  2. If I were to write a blog on the things I wish I knew, I think it would be spot on with this. I love that you mentioned how you kind of shrugged off sleep deprivation and baby blues during your pregnancy, and how it hit you when the baby was actually born. I always thought people were so dramatic when they told me about it, and it was like a ton of bricks when it actually occurred. Such an important blog. Thank you. 💕

    1. I had a love hate relationship. The first trimester was hard because I was so exhausted. Then the second I felt incredible and then the third was hard again lol

  3. I love these tips. Especially number 4. Mom shame is real and we need to be truthful about negative feelings. They happen. It’s not because you are a bad mom! Thank you so much.
    Trish
    Habibi House

  4. Omg I love your post! You said everything that went through my mind for the first couple of months after I gave birth to my daughter. So true!

  5. Such a great list! There is so much that does not get spoken about before a women goes through this! So many of us have been there before we should share our experiences and help prepare others! Thank you for sharing this.

  6. All of these are true. I thought I knew what tired was until I had a baby. The thing about negative feelings is especially true and no one talks about it and everyone feels guilty. I love my daughter and can’t imagine life without her now, but there have been lots of times when I’ve questioned, why did I do this? Then I feel guilty for having the thoughts and the couple people I’ve told have made me feel even more guilty. It’s horrible. It’s a huge life adjustment and no matter how hard you try, you can never fully prepare. It’s just one of those things you’ll never know until you experience it. Thanks for sharing.

    1. Honestly I was so happy when I told my friend my feelings (she has a 7 month old) and she said she had it too. It made me feel so much better. It was probably the worst part of being postu

  7. reading this takes me down to my newborn days. the sleep deprivation and baby blues is so real and relatable. but what I would not give up to have that newborn in my arms again instead of my hard headed toddler! enjoy motherhood and have blessed days ahead.

  8. Oh gosh, that last one… makes my heart swell because it’s so true. With all the challenges and all the hard moments, that love just keeps you going. This is a great round up of all the highs and lows of being a new mom… great post!

    1. It’s so true!! Whenever being a mom gets tough there are so many times during the day that I look at her and it’s like holy crap I love my little human and my heart swells four sizes. It’s worth every hardship. Thanks for your comment!❤️

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